Selfcare is exactly that, taking care of yourself! Simples….

In todays fast paced society, we are pulled from pillar to post running to and from work, getting the supper on, transporting kids to and from school. For what? a scarce few hours awake and present in a home we spend most of our time outside of whilst we work to pay for it and all that that includes. We have children whilst we pay others to be present for them and our time with our partners is spent discussing worry and stress. The quality of our time with those we love is reducing as our society moves faster and faster.

For me selfceare is about stopping still and listening to what your mind and body needs to bring happiness and balance to your life. How can you be strong for your family if you run yourself to mental, emotional and physical exhaustion?

What do you say to yourself in your mind? There’s not enough time, it’s too expensive, I’ll just do this first, I’ll be alright after a coffee/suger/nicotine, its vain, its impractical, I don’t need it, I’ll look/feel selfish?


This is self sabotage and will not lead to the best you. So here is my top 5 simple things you could do to take better care of yourself which is just going to make you a happier you and we all know happy people are the ones we most enjoy spending time with. So why not maximise what free time you do get and make it happy quality time?

  1. Release Stress and free the happy hormones by playing your favourite song…heres mine.
  2. Get your mind to shut up for a bit. For this I use an AMAZING guided meditation, by the very upbeat and down to earth Paul Santisi, called Mind Silence.
  3. WATER!!! Drink two litres a day, it helps flush out toxins, helps maintain elasticity in the skin, aids focus and concentration and helps control snacking (if you feel like snacking, drink a glass of water.. wait 20 minutes and see if you are still honestly hungry).
  4. When you feel like you are about to have an extreme reaction to a situation, gently ask yourself what it is about this that has upset you so much and gently probe why, once you get the answer to that question you can deal with it in a way that leaves you feeling that’s its done and dusted and you will be in complete control. Try it once, you’ll be amazed at what happens.
  5. Create your own Spa Experience at home, create your own ideal experience.. shower in the rainforest, bathe in the Dead Sea.. See where your imagination takes you.
Here’s how I did it, complete with relaxing music on in the background and a single use sheet mask.

So.. this has been a bit of a process for me. Those who know me know that several years ago my physical health took a dramatic turn for the worse. My innocence was stolen at age 10 and thus followed a pattern of doing anything and everything I could to not feel alone and lost, after 20 years of repeated PTSD, many different types of anti depressants, pain killers and suicide attempts, my psychologist helped me to identify a pattern of pushing myself beyond all rational limits to avoid upsetting people until I break myself and crash, I pick myself up, put myself back together and then do it again. It’s a pattern I must break! What happened in childhood destroyed my sense of self worth and made me feel that I had to go to ridiculous levels to prove I deserve to be cared about. I actually permanently damaged both hands and my knee because I couldn’t bring myself to tell anyone that my job was damaging my body on a serious level, I was taking Naproxen and Co codamol everyday for four years as well as getting steroid injections in my hands and knee and wearing support braces, But I still wouldn’t stop, even after the first surgery. Eventually I was signed off work through so much immense body pain that I mentally and emotionally crashed. I had now developed Fibromyalgia and no one could tell me how or why or even how I could fix it… my brain crashed at this point, my whole life had been about trying to fix things and make them better and now I’m being told it can’t be fixed and truthfully I still don’t know what to do with that! The best as I can understand so far is that the severe trauma at the time when the female hormones are supposed to be focussing on development were put straight into a constant anxious state and my boxing it all up inside and shutting the lid until it all explodes out has somehow left my nerve signals in complete chaos.

Tipsyvixxen is in a way my own way of healing and reminding myself to take better care of me, but that to me feels selfish and I struggle with that, so I created the Therapist I would be if I could. I am Qualified (City and Guilds accredited) so I able to give accurate information regarding the subjects I am qualified in, everything else is my rationalisation of the world I’ve seen and the things I’ve tried, the people I come into contact with and how important I feel it is for others to be able to take care of themselves in a world that would charge for the air we breathe if they could find a way of metering it!!

Its been a bit of a journey learning to take better care of myself physically, mentally and emotionally and now I feel ready to share what I’ve learned in a way I feel is ethical and meaningful.

So take this Journey with me and Be Good to Yourself.